“And now we welcome the new year, full of things that have never been”
― Rainer Maria Rilke
In this issue:
Clean sweeps are great. Then what?
From my bookshelves to yours: a book giveaway
Welcome to new subscribers
Where to start? That was the question I asked myself the day after Christmas when I decided that the best way to work through the clutter in my heart and brain was to work through the clutter in my office, on my bookshelves, and a little room off the garage we call “clean storage” -- a vault for everything from Christmas decorations and old 35 mm slides to light bulbs, old newspaper clippings, and… oh god, no….journals, poems, and essays written when I was sixteen.
It’s not the first time I’ve sought clarity within by trying to create it in the space that surrounds me. This time I felt a curious mix of urgency and the desire to lose myself in a concrete task. I told myself it would pave the way for a clean start in 2021 but it is also true that I was not capable of writing or of thinking deeply about anything. The year was evaporating and a new one was about to begin but I was in full retreat, still in healing mode -- “turtling” as one of my friends put it in a kind message sent over the holidays. I figured since I was stuck inside my shell, I might as well clean it up. Some kind of forward motion might help.
Well, here I am, nearly ten days after I started with Project Clean Sweep. My books have been culled and reorganized. I’ve opened the rusted metal file box that contained letters or cards from boyfriends of many years ago. I’ve read them, winced or smiled, and tossed them into the blue recycle bin outside. The bulletin board above my desk -- once obscured by photos, receipts, index cards, lottery tickets, coupons for free drinks, and random notes with story ideas or submission opportunities -- is naked. So is my desk. I’ve emptied four metal file cabinets and have a couple of hundred empty hanging and manila folders ready to give away. I’ve looked at stories I started when I was too young to know what I was doing and some that were terrible even though I was a whole lot older when I wrote them. If I saw a seed of possibility, I kept them. If not, I let them go. The work continues. It’s going well, I guess, but I’m not yet sure that I’m moving forward or retrenching.
On the one hand, I have cleaner shelves and fewer boxes of junk. On the other hand, I have a lot of open space staring expectantly at me every time I walk into my office to start work. And all that delving into the archives shook me a little. I found evidence of big mistakes, false starts or failure in every file, every box. Even the books that give me so much pleasure remind me of the times in my life when I read them and how long ago some of those are now. The whole process has left me feeling hopeful yet vulnerable. Despite all those errors I made, I’m still here and possibility lives in these newly-cleaned spaces. As I look around, though - at my novel, at projects conceived but not developed, at my still-unsettled emotional state which this week’s events in Washington D.C. did nothing to settle -- I am still wondering: where to start?
Thank god for you guys. Writing this newsletter, as hesitant and brief as it is, is my start. From here, I’ll be able to think about the rest. How did you approach the start of this new year? What’s working for you? What isn’t? And mostly, what books are you reading in these first few weeks?
Extreme Clean
If you are an AbFab fan you’ve seen this. If not, enjoy a look at the kind of obsessive decluttering that I will never achieve.
My Loss is Your (Potential) Gain
Looking for a new book and don’t mind if it has been sitting on my shelf for a while? Every couple of weeks I’ll be giving a book or two away. All you have to do is let me know in the comments below or by emailing me at elizabethmarro@substack.com that you are interested and I’ll draw a winner or winners from the list of those who respond. I’ll randomize the list and draw the winners using tools at random.org. I’ll wipe down the books and ship them to you by snail mail. This week’s offering is The Family Fang by Kevin Wilson. The deadline for responding: Wednesday at 11 AM Pacific Time. I’ll draw the name on Wednesday, January 13th at noon Pacific Time.
About this book:
Kevin Wilson explores art, family, and how the two can create a toxic mixture in The Family Fang. His wit, humor, and insight make this story about two siblings who must come to grips with themselves and their parents whose performance art shapes their lives. The parents’ final performance triggers a journey for siblings Buster and Annie that can either free them entirely or suck them into the dynamic that has scarred each of them.
What I loved: the writing, the characters, the way that Wilson deftly weaves tragedy and comedy. I just finished his most recent book Nothing To See Here which I loved even more than The Family Fang. In Nothing to See Here, he offers us the study of a friendship, inequality, and children who spontaneously combust in what is ultimately a story about love.
You can stream a movie version with Justin Bateman, Christopher Walken, and Nicole Kidman on Netflix or some of the other streaming services.
A short read and a great movie
I am not a fan of rodents but this piece made me reconsider the mouse. Naturalist and artist Amy Jean Porter’s Wild Life is a joy - an illustrated story each week about the animals among us.
The Professor and The Madman was a happy surprise. Who knew the birth of the Oxford English Dictionary made for such a gripping story? Without the help of a man with schizophrenia who is imprisoned for murder, the dictionary might never have come into being.
Welcome to all new subscribers!
Thanks for signing on. I’m looking forward to connecting with you. Holler if you have any questions or ideas and do not hesitate to let me know what you’d like to see more of or ideas for topics we can tackle here in the Spark community.
That’s it for this week! Let me know how you are, and what you are reading. I love hearing from you. In fact, start thinking about this right now: what book(s) did you read in 2020 that you are most glad you read for whatever reason. If there is one you regret reading, share that too. We can all read each other’s choices in the last issue of the year.
Meanwhile, don’t forget - all books mentioned here are available through the Spark Community Recommendations page at bookshop.org where every sale benefits local bookstores and helps us raise money for literacy programs.
Thank you for reading. Stay safe. Stay healthy. See you next week.
Betsy
P.S. And now your moment of Zen…sun, lake, and a New England winter from Jen E.
Calling for Your Contribution to “Moment of Zen”
What is YOUR moment of Zen? Send me your photos, a video, a drawing, a song, a poem, or anything with a visual that moved you, thrilled you, calmed you. Or just cracked you up. This feature is wide open for your own personal interpretation.
Come on, go through your photos, your memories or just keep your eyes and ears to the ground and then share. Send your photos/links, etc. to me by replying to this email or simply by sending to: elizabethmarro@substack.com. The main guidelines are probably already obvious: don’t hurt anyone -- don’t send anything that violates the privacy of someone you love or even someone you hate, don’t send anything divisive, or aimed at disparaging others. Our Zen moments are to help us connect, to bond, to learn, to wonder, to share -- to escape the world for a little bit and return refreshed.
I can’t wait to see what you send!
Hi, I would like to join the raffle for the book :) And on clearing out: I had one book entitled “Letting Go of Clutter” which I finally, you guessed it, let go. On the other hand, one person’s clutter is another person’s treasured and life affirming memory - especially when the very touch of it can spark feeling in your gut. While my well-curated artifacts spend the majority of their time in a box I seldom open, I know that when I do they will inform me in a way no digital representation could.
I love your cleansing initiative. so freeing in so many ways. I'd love to enter your contest for most any book you've gleaned from your shelves -)