26 Comments

We moved at the end of my 4th grade year so I can relate to being the "new kid" starting my fifth grade year. I didn't really make friends until junior high because everyone was somewhat clique-ish since they'd all gone to school together since kindergarten.

I went to my 25th high school graduation. I quickly realized I had nothing in common with my classmates. By this time, I had left the area and my life as an air force wife was soooo different than the people who stayed in town.

I have a few friends left from junior high and high school. Sadly, I have lost 2 of them to cancer. I am grateful for my remaining friends because they are a touchstone to my past. But I've gladly skipped all of my last reunions.

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Safe journeys, Betsy both getting there and being part of it (the reunion). I haven't written any specifically high-school stories yet, and not sure I want to, but as you say...there are things to be learned with each writing.

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I hope so. Making an effort is similar to charting pieces of life. I’d like to hear about your perspective. 😊

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I went to school with most of the same kids for 12 years. Class size reached a peak of 24 at one point. Our class never truly had a formal 'class reunion'. Once in a while, a few got together. A few classes joined up to have enough to attend a 'formal class reunion.' Oh well.

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Small classes make it harder, I think. Our class was small -- less than a hundred kids total and those of us who live far away rarely make it back. I guess the idea that it's been fifty years makes this one significant for a lot of folks. It seems as though a bunch are going to try to go.

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Reunions before the twentieth are just people bragging. After that, real life has kicked in, and you have something in common again to talk about..

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I loved this succinct analysis!

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Memoirs about bad childhoods are a particular draw for me. Mary Karr's The Liar's Club, and Lauren Hough's memoir-in-essays Leaving Isn't the Hardest Thing stick with me. As to reunions, I attended only one high school reunion. It was the first time I was invited, and it was the 30th. It was not a great experience for me. I don't remember what I expected, but that didn't happen. Instead, I was asked questions about my dead first husband (a batterer), and voted the "Most Changed." Which they did not mean as a compliment, believe me. In truth I was the most changed, though they meant my physical appearance. Everyone's physical appearance had changed -- of course, but no one had seen me in decades.

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That sounds rough, Sandra. I'm guessing you've not been back? I loved Lauren Hough's book and really look forward to her next one. I've never read Mary Karr. Interestingly, I don't reach for memoir first -- fiction is my love - but when I do it is usually because of the writing. I've just finished Bobi Conn's In the Shadow of the Valley - you would appreciate it. She tells a story of growing up hard in Kentucky and the result is a far more nuanced read than Hillbilly Elegy.

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Haha, no, I've never been back. I'll put Bobi Conn's book on hold. I never read Hillbilly Elegy because I heard right away he was not the one to read.

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Betsy! I'm so glad you're enjoying A Coin in Nine Hands! I was thinking about that book this week and about how I should reread it soon. Regarding reunions: I swore to never go to a high school reunion because I didn't want to relive those days and everyone I'd want to see there I'm already in touch with. But then I went to Donna's high school reunion, and I was very moved by how happy everyone was to see each other and to remember their shared experience. So, I changed my mind about these things and in May I went to my high school reunion. I had a great time. It was a bit of a shock being back in my home town, and walking down the street in 2024 only to get to the venue and suddenly be transported to 1994. But I had a great time! Saw some people I hadn't seen in a long time, had some laughs, got some gossip, and then Ieft and was teleported back to the present day. In all, a good time!

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I really do love this book, Mike. In fact, it's structure is something I am going to play with in another project. It really got me thinking.

My only reunion experiences so far are two of my husband's. It was a gas - I soaked up all those stories like a sponge with none of the angst. It was great. I'm looking forward to this one of mine though. It will be special no matter what.

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Betsy - what a great retelling of your unceremonious and unexpected 'dumpster dive'!

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Thanks PJ!

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Great post. I've never been to a reunion, other than family ones. I have been bullied, though never physically. My tormentors called me DICK-tionary and other names, for being a know-it-all smart ass. I definitely was one.

As to your book list I haven't read any of these books (!) but I also have Starter Dog and The Ministry of Time on my TBR.

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The Ministry of Time really captured my interest after I listened to an interview with the author just as it came out. It sounded so imaginative and of course the Arctic explorer character was fun for me.

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My 20 year high school reunion was bizarre. I wish I would have documented it better. The 30 year is coming up in two weeks and it will probably be boring.

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Hey Julie - I'd love to hear what was bizarre about the 20tt and I'd love to know why you think the next one will be boring? You'll have to let us know how it went...

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Betsy, you are a speed reader; I am not. But I am excited about a book I just started to read called "The Lady Waiting" by Magdalena Zyzak. It's about Viva, a Polish expat, who literally picks up Bobby, a zany monied lady stranded on the side of a freeway, & things happen. I love the writing: "his face enrages the common man on sight," "the handsomeness doubts itself around the chin and panics at the chest," She's a human Freudian slip." I will read it slow and chew on morsels to come.

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No, not a speed reader. I was just immobilized by a low-grade depression for a long time and reading and writing were about all I could handle. I just gave myself over to these books.

I really loved the lines from "The Lady Waiting" - what a great read! I am going to add that one to my TBR. I wish I could sum up a character so well as when she says "She's a Human Freudian Slip."

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I had not planned on going to my 50th High School Reunion; I never felt comfortable with those public school kids, after being bullied by the nuns at Blessed Sacrament Elementary. And the reunion dates never aligned with my annual visit to see Mom in October for her birthday celebration.

Until...dates changed and I realized I would be in my hometown of Natrona Heights and able to attend Har-Brack High's big 5-0 celebration.

I wasn't excited but I was encouraged by a few from the class that had reached out to me and said a gay would be welcomed, that they had changed in their conservative thoughts about the homosexuals.

So, 100% out of curiosity, I enlisted my sister (my spouse stayed home in San Diego) to escort and protect me for a cocktail hour appearance.

Name tags allowed me to recognize a number of former students and pleasant conversation ensued for the most part; some had not aged well, while others remained perky. Some were retired; others not. There lives seemed...boring. Two drinks and my sister and I were out of there.

This would be my first and last visit to a high school reunion.

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This one will be my 50th too. I think that's why I want to go. It may be the first and last time just because of where I live and how much older we are all getting. I'm glad yours worked out.

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Have a great time in Jefferson✨🥀💓

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We'll see, Kitty, we'll see.

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Nice story. Great ending. Well done.

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Thank you, Maureen.

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