This was a great piece, Betsy. You gave me a lot to think about. I recently visited a friend in a senior living community that had many restaurants, ways to get around on the property, public gardens and community gardens, walking paths, fitness classes and best of all, scores of events that are well attended. Many events revolve around books and writing. This senior lifestyle is great for being engaged and involved. Brain and body must respond well to such stimulating opportunities close by. Local libraries and senior centers offer many such excellent events and have broad appeal. To be part of a senior community open to diverse social and intellectual opportunities, however, is obviously preferable to the struggles experienced by people isolated by their age and/or poverty. The older and more isolated you become, the more poverty hurts. I suppose this is obvious but this essay really got me thinking. Thank you.
Money is POWER, and our government allows the RICH to control our lives: the Supreme Court pushes their political power with the ability to contribute stacks of millions for campaigns that can turn almost any election in the direction of THEIR choice. In my youth I somehow got the idea that being poor was better than being rich; that heaven welcomes the poor more readily into the pearly gates. As I moved away from anything religious and grappled with everyday life, I realized that if I wanted comfort I had to earn enough to purchase that comfort. I also realized that I did not need to be RICH to be happier, to collect comfort, & to wield power over others. I bought lottery tickets for decades in the hope I would be able to INFLUENCE others (yes; with $$$$$), but I finally got frightened with the thought of actually winning the lottery (I didn't want that responsibility). In the end, I don't object to individuals being lucky enough (inheritance), or intelligent enough (Elon Musk/Jeff Bezos), to make truckloads of money on a daily basis, but they should have the responsibility to share their wealth with US (a minimum tax on fortunes perhaps). I am comfortable with what I have, which is more than many; I don't need more, although sometimes I might enjoy the POWER that comes with a bigger bank balance.
You hit on the thing that gets me every time: in the face of rampant inequality, why isn't it fair to ask that those who can pay more, do so? In almost every case, the wealthy have benefited from the laws, breaks, and system that prevails in this country. Most could not be as well off without that. So, what does that mean? This is where my expectations flare up like big orange flames. I still want society to benefit more from those who have benefited from it. As a Catholic, I was taught by nuns that to be poor was better than being rich. Then I consider the upper hierarchy of the church and the way that the church's wealth and influence have led to corruption and more unfairness, I realize we will always be at the mercy of human instincts and needs. And not always the best of instincts.
But I think, after writing this post, it's a bit easier to separate in my mind that individuals can be human and trying even in systems that invite me to skate right over that and judge them with the disappointment I feel in society as a whole. And in the end, I realize I can only control my own decisions and behavior -- same with everyone else.
I love Dickens, and I have always struggled financially. I believe I would appreciate his novels whether rich or poor, because I love literature- but I must admit I think his stories resonate with me in a way that might not be as deeply appreciated by a person who doesn’t understand struggle. Perhaps that is my own personal hubris— I do struggle with this. I so much want to be fair and generous!
Thank you, Lori. You are illustrating one of the points that I struggled to articulate -- it may not really matter what our personal financial situation is when it comes to human feelings and responses. Dickens' stories resonate with you because of the artistry but also because you recognize people who have struggled in similar ways. At the same time, you are struggling with what you call your "own personal hubris" -- the desire to be fair and generous is strong but so is the feeling that comes with recognizing the basic disparities and unfairness of life. Not everyone struggles with wanting to be fair or generous. It's so much easier just to ignore or judge. Honestly, for me, it is so much easier to process all this in fiction that in real life!
Betsy, you set yourself quite a challenge linking David Copperfield to David Roberts, and you kept me with you all the way. It's been years since I read Great Expectations, but I regularly read David Roberts for the clarifying jolt of discomfort that he brings. By reckoning with the obligations and expectations that surround money, he pushes us to do the same.
Well, thank you, Rona. Pip, David, and David all sent me down a certain road that was difficult at first to stay upon. The detours called me from all directions.
It helped me to realize what I was actually feeling when I read David Roberts' posts. It took some time to sift through the sources of my discomfort. There was a knee-jerk reaction when I read about $4,000 hotel rooms that is important to move past in order to get somewhere true and meaningful for me.
Poor: unable to save. Rich: Able to buy groceries, gas, or health services without concern for how much any of them cost. “How comfortable are you when you are with people who you are richer or poorer than you are?” When they’re richer, I’m only uncomfortable if they fancy themselves superior because of their money; poorer, I’m not uncomfortable unless they are. “How does the wealth or absence of it in others impact your expectations of them, if at all?” It really doesn’t. You’re decent or you’re not.
Thank you for this interesting post! There’s so much judgment placed on people who have or don’t have money - and there are so many people determined to be or appear wealthy, or flaunt their wealth (bags or clothes with expensive labels splashed ostentatiously across them) - and is something that’s been bothering me for a while. The notion that money = superiority of any kind other than an ability to make money is both obnoxious and absurd, and whether it’s people with money or those without who see wealthy people as “better,” I’m annoyed by both equally.
As I read the last part of your comment the image of a bejeweled Birkin bag that was in the LA Times recently came to mind. It is a trigger for all kinds of judgment but, luckily I suppose, I know no one who has such a thing or ever would.
At the end of the day I agree with what you say up front: you're either decent or you're not. When confronted with anyone who comes at me with the idea that they are better than me, I get really uncomfortable and really irritated. I am strongly tempted in those situations to leave decency behind.
I did like the book but I especially appreciated your take on it. Your writing has often led me to a new place and a new reflection whether the topic is food, family, money, life, or all of the above.
For me, poor means living with discomfort -- not enough food, concern about housing, saving up to buy a pair of shoes, never eating in a restaurant, and everyone works outside the home. Having been raised poor, and now living paycheck to paycheck once again, I'm aware of how much of my experience gets in the way of my having sympathy for those who've never experienced being poor. Not in real life as much as in my reading. In real life, most of the people I love and enjoy are NOT struggling, and I do feel sympathy and empathy for them when they share their pain. But when I'm reading a book, I'm aware of my old resentments.
You've raised something really important here, Sandra. In addition to defining what poor means to you, you've described an awareness of how your own experience "gets in the way" of empathizing with those who've never experienced being poor. It's interesting that the obstacles rise more often when you are reading rather than real life.
Your comment made me reflect on all the ways my own experience affects my reactions to people I perceive as wealthy. I have people in my extended family who were/are quite well off. I have people in my family who are not. Both groups affect my sense of what is fair and how much I can empathize with some of the decisions others make. This, in fact, was one of the factors that made this post difficult to write and makes me want to explore the issue more deeply in the future.
Dickens gave voice to the poor and vulnerable and, in my mind, was sympathetic towards them, perhaps as a result of his time as a child working in a shoe blacking factory.
A friend says of contemporary (British) TV soaps that they appeal to millions because they portray a underclass they are fearful of. I suspect Dickens’ popularity was, in part, because his readers feared the dark places he explored.
I am sure if Dickens was with us now he would be a rich author happy with progressive taxation, disdainful of charity, and see himself as having little in common with the rich around him.🐰
This is interesting. Are you suggesting that portraying a class of people in fiction that would frighten the readers "in real life" gives them the opportunity to travel safely to these "dark" places? I wonder how reading the books alters their perspectives, if at all?
As for Dickens today? You are undoubtedly right although one of the questions that rises up in me is how wealth/success, however they are defined, alters how a person behaves with respect to charity, taxation, and how they view themselves.
Maybe we should look to Stephen King. He seems to have been raised poor/working class with an absentee father after the age of two. I wonder how his views have changed.
Please forgive my long reply to your questions Betsy.
I don’t know about American TV soaps, but I have never, ever, watched a U.K. soap continuously, but the characters seem to go from one angst ridden crisis episode after episode and a regular watcher, who is on a low income, living in less than decent private landlord housing, and in a crap job, may take comfort from the fact that they are living a better life than the fictional characters they know intimately are.
U.K. TV listings magazines give up their covers most weeks and a good few pages to soaps and their characters. In fairness they often seem to run storylines relating to topical social issues, such as abortion, illicit relationships and gender issues, which get people talking about these issues using the soap in question as the means by which they can take part in such a discussion. And that has to be a good thing.
And middle class viewers watch and have their political/social prejudices about the working class played out before their eyes. ‘Give them more money and the feckless poor will waste it, so why give it to them in the first place? They are fearful of what they see in the same way as 19th century readers of Dickens would have been.
Ultimately, society is a collection of parallel ‘universes’ which have little contact with one another and what they know of one of one another is through TV and the media and how they are treated at work. I doubt if a month goes by without me having an argument with someone who sees individuals on state benefits and asylum seekers as scroungers. Not my take at all.
Writers of popular fiction have an important role to play in portraying the lives of working class folk; those who, like you and me, frequent corner cafes and not lush bars and who believe that a world of modest aspirations should be no less worthy of fictionalising than a character who chases success on a grand scale.
Forgive me Betsy, but you did ask!
As for your second question, perhaps another day. All I will say is that the rich, understandably, have accountants who take advantage of tax rules and loopholes. They can be closed. All we have to do is to elect politicians into office with the courage to introduce a fairer system of taxation and, I am sure, there are a good few rich people who would have no problem with paying more in taxes.🐰
I am a huge Dickens fan and I highly recommend Oliver Twist, which would be the perfect follow up to your last two. It is quite funny, also, and sweet. My favorite is Bleak House (so wittty!) but I seldom recommend it because so many people find it boring (!). I've read that book at least three times, along with A Tale of Two Cities. His tales are engrossing, yes, but mostly he had an unerring eye and ear for character, dialogue, and what my writing teacher hubby would call "character-revealing action."
I remember reading Cinderella and other stories of poor girls and boys suddenly becoming pricesses and what not. I was a poor kid, my family was often on welfare and I hated the embarrassment of buying food with food stamps and the fear of being seen picking up commodity food (like bags of macaroni and huge blocks of a soft cheddar cheese like Velveeta) with my mom. I dreamed of sudden wealth but instead of course, I went to work at 15 and haven't stopped for very long since. I love my work luckily and I feel quite wealthy, though I suppose in fact we're barely middle class.
Good post and such excellent book and Substack recs, as always!
I just received my stack of used copies of the Dickens books I ordered recently. The package includes Oliver Twist and Bleak House of course but both will have to wait because I made the mistake of finding a copy of Little Dorrit first and I'm kind of hooked.
I think those stories like Cinderella and similar tales worked on me and my expectations. I love a good lottery story these days. There is that fantasy, that magic, of being able to solve all the problems with one big windfall. And of course to live happily ever after :)
I've had periods in my life when I have had negative bank balances and have been very "creative" about making it from one week to another. I always had a roof over my head or a place I knew I could go, at least temporarily, if worse came to worst. The indebtedness I had to my family weighed on my and made me feel very useless at times. I was so glad when I finally was earning more than enough to take care of my son and me. I've never forgotten that feeling of relief.
For me it was starting to work at Sunbelt and quickly getting medical benefits for me and even being able to add Russel (from our own pockets, but at a lower group-level cost). It was amazing!
Medical benefits mean a huge difference in overall financial security. I was uninsured briefly when I was between jobs and that's when my son was hospitalized at six for a severe autoimmune reaction which required eight more weeks of follow-up care. I do not know what would have happened if other forces had not helped me stay afloat. Similarly, even today, when we all have much more accessible health care insurance, it is devastating to see how multiple cancer diagnoses and related issues have upended the lives of family members we love dearly. Health is often the thing that can push people into poverty, sometimes over night.
To press the ‘LIKE’ button seems wrong when what I want to express is the anger I feel for the injustice of the situation you find yourself in and countless others as well. Free Healthcare is a basic right when needed in my book and should be paid for out of general taxation. 🐰
Dang woman, those questions you ask at the beginning of this wondrously provocative post -- phew! I need many hours to wrap my head around the complexity of how we all go through life, feeling rich or poor, or richer or poorer than others....Hope to come back around and make a more articulate comment! But re: GREAT EXPECTATIONS -- that great classic has always stayed with me. I read it as a kid, and as an adult. More anon!
I look forward to whatever thoughts want to come out whenever they are ready, Bernadette. Honestly, I wrestled with a lot of the same issues as I tried to write it. I kept backing off of some of the more difficult issues as they manifested themselves in my own life.
I read recently a comment on this subject that talked about the notion of fairness in all of this and I think that's where I get stuck. How to make it all a little bit more fair, but then I consider all over again the question of okay, how should I contribute to making it more fair?
I'm glad I read GE now. I wonder if it would have made the same impact on me as a kid?
Okay here's my honest answers to your questions, Betsy! YIKES! "How do you define poor?"
Not having enough funds to pay bills. Going to sleep at night worrying about wracking up more debt just to get by....(thankfully not living like that at the moment but sadly had many months or years like that in my up-and-down financially unstable life/career).
"How do you define rich?"
Feeling fulfilled by my work and life and having enough funds to not only pay bills but not worry about spending $ to eat out or take a trip or buy a gift for someone (or myself).
"How comfortable are you when you are with people who you are richer or poorer than you are?"
Very interesting question. I am super comfortable with anyone who is wealthier (or more famous-ha)! than me if that person is comfortable with me not being on their financial strata. If they just treat me as their neighbor or college and not like a 2nd class citizen. I notice my own judgment of "rich" people is not very kind when certain rich people are not kind themselves....And yet I know on some level, I should have compassion for anyone who is clearly suffering (or emotionally impoverished) and sometimes I do, but sometimes it's challenging when their unkindness is out to demean others.
Which reminds me of Miss Havisham! I don't imagine I had compassion for her as a young woman when I read "Great Expectations" but now thinking of that visceral character, I can't relate to how outwardly "rich" she was but I can feel great empathy for her acute loneliness, dashed dreams and pain.
"How does the wealth or absence of it in others impact your expectations of them, if at all? "
My parents were middle class or lower middle class, because they had eight children to support, as well as foster kids, and foreign students in and out of our household...They were sometimes worried about paying bills, and I would hear the tension in my mother or father's voice when they discussed finances. We sometimes had to do without. We didn't have luxuries. BUT my parents instilled in all of us at an early age, that we shouldn't compare ourselves to others, if we complained that our next door neighbor had a "pool" or a "new bike".... When I was about 11 years of age, my parents somehow miraculously stretched their dollars and managed to buy us a cabin in the Berkshires. Really, a "shack" as my father called it...the biggest gift I could have ever dreamed of -- and many of my siblings as well. The happiest and "richest" days and nights and years of my childhood were going to this very rustic cabin (no running water, an outhouse) and swimming, hiking, picking wild flowers or berries, to our heart's content. ..
Even with the extraordinary gift of our "fancy" cabin, we didn't have a lot of extra "things" or even clothes. My sisters still give me their hand-me-downs and I love them!.... I have always identified with the working class, or those who struggle financially, coming from this family of eight children. So while I was taught the value of not comparing myself to others, who had more, I wasn't really taught or encouraged to make a lot of money. My parents did encourage me to pursue my dreams (of being a professional actor) but I don't think they or I focused on the financial aspect of my life, as a young actor, besides just making enough to get by. I never even allowed myself to dream it would be possible to make much money in this profession. I was so focused on my career, artistically, not financially, that it wasn't until I was much older, that I was able to save any money. And then a pandemic hits...And a strike hits. And there's two major work stoppages within a few years and yowsa, there goes one's savings! I do have regrets about not saving more money, but don't have any regrets about the rewarding profession I chose. And at 63 years of age, I say "it's never too late to learn" -- I save more now....and I also spend money on quality of life experiences (with family)...I hope to continue working well into my 70's and 80's and beyond... Thanks for this thought-provoking post Betsy. I'm sorry to be so loquacious but I have always found issues of class and finances so incredibly complex!
I am grateful for the time you took to share all this, Bernadette. There is so much here. As someone who forsook (is that a word) her journalistic career to get an MBA and go into business, I was often caught in the conflict of what was meaningful to do and practical to do. Having a child at a young age pushed me in the direction of practical. Reading about your journey shows me a version of the path I could have followed and didn't. I have mixed feelings about that. Being from a big family as we both are (five kids in mine, six stepsibs), that also underscores the value of sharing whatever we can whenever we can.
Re: comparing one's self to others -- that is such an important lesson. Where does it get us in the end? And how wonderful that your parents encouraged you. That's gold right there.
I hear ya! If I had a child or children, I would not have had the « luxury » to choose my artistic path…And in all likelihood would have gone the practical route . And pardon the typos in my long raw response! 🤣 Ie, colleague, not college! ❤️
Thank you, David. I look forward to reading more from you as you figure it all out. Thanks, too, for your subscription!
I was hoping to read Bleak House next but Little Dorrit fell into my hands first and now I'm hooked so BH will have to wait. I am almost glad I waited so long to immerse myself in Dickens. I can appreciate his work so much more deeply than I could have years ago.
You aspire to be aware always and this strikes me as one of the best and healthiest things you can do for yourself and those around you. In particular, I will reflect further on "recognizing the complexity of individual experiences." As I've aged I realize that there is so much more to the daily experience of a human being that never shows on the surface.
This was a great piece, Betsy. You gave me a lot to think about. I recently visited a friend in a senior living community that had many restaurants, ways to get around on the property, public gardens and community gardens, walking paths, fitness classes and best of all, scores of events that are well attended. Many events revolve around books and writing. This senior lifestyle is great for being engaged and involved. Brain and body must respond well to such stimulating opportunities close by. Local libraries and senior centers offer many such excellent events and have broad appeal. To be part of a senior community open to diverse social and intellectual opportunities, however, is obviously preferable to the struggles experienced by people isolated by their age and/or poverty. The older and more isolated you become, the more poverty hurts. I suppose this is obvious but this essay really got me thinking. Thank you.
This article in today’s Guardian may be of interest:
Creators of new drama The Hardacres decry lack of working-class TV
https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2024/sep/29/creators-of-new-drama-the-hardacres-decry-lack-of-working-class-tv
Amen
The brilliant American short-story writer and poet Raymond Carver died in 1988 at 50 after battling cancer for eleven years. Toward the end he summed up his life in the poem "Gravy": https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/1988/08/29/gravy#:~:text=Gravy%20these%20past%20ten%20years.%20Alive,%20sober,%20working,%20loving%20and. At 80, I understand that Carver knew that, in the most important of all ways, he died a wealthy man.
Money is POWER, and our government allows the RICH to control our lives: the Supreme Court pushes their political power with the ability to contribute stacks of millions for campaigns that can turn almost any election in the direction of THEIR choice. In my youth I somehow got the idea that being poor was better than being rich; that heaven welcomes the poor more readily into the pearly gates. As I moved away from anything religious and grappled with everyday life, I realized that if I wanted comfort I had to earn enough to purchase that comfort. I also realized that I did not need to be RICH to be happier, to collect comfort, & to wield power over others. I bought lottery tickets for decades in the hope I would be able to INFLUENCE others (yes; with $$$$$), but I finally got frightened with the thought of actually winning the lottery (I didn't want that responsibility). In the end, I don't object to individuals being lucky enough (inheritance), or intelligent enough (Elon Musk/Jeff Bezos), to make truckloads of money on a daily basis, but they should have the responsibility to share their wealth with US (a minimum tax on fortunes perhaps). I am comfortable with what I have, which is more than many; I don't need more, although sometimes I might enjoy the POWER that comes with a bigger bank balance.
You hit on the thing that gets me every time: in the face of rampant inequality, why isn't it fair to ask that those who can pay more, do so? In almost every case, the wealthy have benefited from the laws, breaks, and system that prevails in this country. Most could not be as well off without that. So, what does that mean? This is where my expectations flare up like big orange flames. I still want society to benefit more from those who have benefited from it. As a Catholic, I was taught by nuns that to be poor was better than being rich. Then I consider the upper hierarchy of the church and the way that the church's wealth and influence have led to corruption and more unfairness, I realize we will always be at the mercy of human instincts and needs. And not always the best of instincts.
But I think, after writing this post, it's a bit easier to separate in my mind that individuals can be human and trying even in systems that invite me to skate right over that and judge them with the disappointment I feel in society as a whole. And in the end, I realize I can only control my own decisions and behavior -- same with everyone else.
I love Dickens, and I have always struggled financially. I believe I would appreciate his novels whether rich or poor, because I love literature- but I must admit I think his stories resonate with me in a way that might not be as deeply appreciated by a person who doesn’t understand struggle. Perhaps that is my own personal hubris— I do struggle with this. I so much want to be fair and generous!
Thank you, Lori. You are illustrating one of the points that I struggled to articulate -- it may not really matter what our personal financial situation is when it comes to human feelings and responses. Dickens' stories resonate with you because of the artistry but also because you recognize people who have struggled in similar ways. At the same time, you are struggling with what you call your "own personal hubris" -- the desire to be fair and generous is strong but so is the feeling that comes with recognizing the basic disparities and unfairness of life. Not everyone struggles with wanting to be fair or generous. It's so much easier just to ignore or judge. Honestly, for me, it is so much easier to process all this in fiction that in real life!
Absolutely, Elizabeth! Fiction is a wonderful teacher! Thank you for your insight.
Betsy, you set yourself quite a challenge linking David Copperfield to David Roberts, and you kept me with you all the way. It's been years since I read Great Expectations, but I regularly read David Roberts for the clarifying jolt of discomfort that he brings. By reckoning with the obligations and expectations that surround money, he pushes us to do the same.
Well, thank you, Rona. Pip, David, and David all sent me down a certain road that was difficult at first to stay upon. The detours called me from all directions.
It helped me to realize what I was actually feeling when I read David Roberts' posts. It took some time to sift through the sources of my discomfort. There was a knee-jerk reaction when I read about $4,000 hotel rooms that is important to move past in order to get somewhere true and meaningful for me.
Poor: unable to save. Rich: Able to buy groceries, gas, or health services without concern for how much any of them cost. “How comfortable are you when you are with people who you are richer or poorer than you are?” When they’re richer, I’m only uncomfortable if they fancy themselves superior because of their money; poorer, I’m not uncomfortable unless they are. “How does the wealth or absence of it in others impact your expectations of them, if at all?” It really doesn’t. You’re decent or you’re not.
Thank you for this interesting post! There’s so much judgment placed on people who have or don’t have money - and there are so many people determined to be or appear wealthy, or flaunt their wealth (bags or clothes with expensive labels splashed ostentatiously across them) - and is something that’s been bothering me for a while. The notion that money = superiority of any kind other than an ability to make money is both obnoxious and absurd, and whether it’s people with money or those without who see wealthy people as “better,” I’m annoyed by both equally.
As I read the last part of your comment the image of a bejeweled Birkin bag that was in the LA Times recently came to mind. It is a trigger for all kinds of judgment but, luckily I suppose, I know no one who has such a thing or ever would.
At the end of the day I agree with what you say up front: you're either decent or you're not. When confronted with anyone who comes at me with the idea that they are better than me, I get really uncomfortable and really irritated. I am strongly tempted in those situations to leave decency behind.
Thank you so much for the shoutout! I'm glad that you liked the book too :)
I did like the book but I especially appreciated your take on it. Your writing has often led me to a new place and a new reflection whether the topic is food, family, money, life, or all of the above.
For me, poor means living with discomfort -- not enough food, concern about housing, saving up to buy a pair of shoes, never eating in a restaurant, and everyone works outside the home. Having been raised poor, and now living paycheck to paycheck once again, I'm aware of how much of my experience gets in the way of my having sympathy for those who've never experienced being poor. Not in real life as much as in my reading. In real life, most of the people I love and enjoy are NOT struggling, and I do feel sympathy and empathy for them when they share their pain. But when I'm reading a book, I'm aware of my old resentments.
You've raised something really important here, Sandra. In addition to defining what poor means to you, you've described an awareness of how your own experience "gets in the way" of empathizing with those who've never experienced being poor. It's interesting that the obstacles rise more often when you are reading rather than real life.
Your comment made me reflect on all the ways my own experience affects my reactions to people I perceive as wealthy. I have people in my extended family who were/are quite well off. I have people in my family who are not. Both groups affect my sense of what is fair and how much I can empathize with some of the decisions others make. This, in fact, was one of the factors that made this post difficult to write and makes me want to explore the issue more deeply in the future.
I look forward to those explorations if you share them.
Dickens gave voice to the poor and vulnerable and, in my mind, was sympathetic towards them, perhaps as a result of his time as a child working in a shoe blacking factory.
A friend says of contemporary (British) TV soaps that they appeal to millions because they portray a underclass they are fearful of. I suspect Dickens’ popularity was, in part, because his readers feared the dark places he explored.
I am sure if Dickens was with us now he would be a rich author happy with progressive taxation, disdainful of charity, and see himself as having little in common with the rich around him.🐰
This is interesting. Are you suggesting that portraying a class of people in fiction that would frighten the readers "in real life" gives them the opportunity to travel safely to these "dark" places? I wonder how reading the books alters their perspectives, if at all?
As for Dickens today? You are undoubtedly right although one of the questions that rises up in me is how wealth/success, however they are defined, alters how a person behaves with respect to charity, taxation, and how they view themselves.
Maybe we should look to Stephen King. He seems to have been raised poor/working class with an absentee father after the age of two. I wonder how his views have changed.
Please forgive my long reply to your questions Betsy.
I don’t know about American TV soaps, but I have never, ever, watched a U.K. soap continuously, but the characters seem to go from one angst ridden crisis episode after episode and a regular watcher, who is on a low income, living in less than decent private landlord housing, and in a crap job, may take comfort from the fact that they are living a better life than the fictional characters they know intimately are.
U.K. TV listings magazines give up their covers most weeks and a good few pages to soaps and their characters. In fairness they often seem to run storylines relating to topical social issues, such as abortion, illicit relationships and gender issues, which get people talking about these issues using the soap in question as the means by which they can take part in such a discussion. And that has to be a good thing.
And middle class viewers watch and have their political/social prejudices about the working class played out before their eyes. ‘Give them more money and the feckless poor will waste it, so why give it to them in the first place? They are fearful of what they see in the same way as 19th century readers of Dickens would have been.
Ultimately, society is a collection of parallel ‘universes’ which have little contact with one another and what they know of one of one another is through TV and the media and how they are treated at work. I doubt if a month goes by without me having an argument with someone who sees individuals on state benefits and asylum seekers as scroungers. Not my take at all.
Writers of popular fiction have an important role to play in portraying the lives of working class folk; those who, like you and me, frequent corner cafes and not lush bars and who believe that a world of modest aspirations should be no less worthy of fictionalising than a character who chases success on a grand scale.
Forgive me Betsy, but you did ask!
As for your second question, perhaps another day. All I will say is that the rich, understandably, have accountants who take advantage of tax rules and loopholes. They can be closed. All we have to do is to elect politicians into office with the courage to introduce a fairer system of taxation and, I am sure, there are a good few rich people who would have no problem with paying more in taxes.🐰
I am a huge Dickens fan and I highly recommend Oliver Twist, which would be the perfect follow up to your last two. It is quite funny, also, and sweet. My favorite is Bleak House (so wittty!) but I seldom recommend it because so many people find it boring (!). I've read that book at least three times, along with A Tale of Two Cities. His tales are engrossing, yes, but mostly he had an unerring eye and ear for character, dialogue, and what my writing teacher hubby would call "character-revealing action."
I remember reading Cinderella and other stories of poor girls and boys suddenly becoming pricesses and what not. I was a poor kid, my family was often on welfare and I hated the embarrassment of buying food with food stamps and the fear of being seen picking up commodity food (like bags of macaroni and huge blocks of a soft cheddar cheese like Velveeta) with my mom. I dreamed of sudden wealth but instead of course, I went to work at 15 and haven't stopped for very long since. I love my work luckily and I feel quite wealthy, though I suppose in fact we're barely middle class.
Good post and such excellent book and Substack recs, as always!
I just received my stack of used copies of the Dickens books I ordered recently. The package includes Oliver Twist and Bleak House of course but both will have to wait because I made the mistake of finding a copy of Little Dorrit first and I'm kind of hooked.
I think those stories like Cinderella and similar tales worked on me and my expectations. I love a good lottery story these days. There is that fantasy, that magic, of being able to solve all the problems with one big windfall. And of course to live happily ever after :)
I've had periods in my life when I have had negative bank balances and have been very "creative" about making it from one week to another. I always had a roof over my head or a place I knew I could go, at least temporarily, if worse came to worst. The indebtedness I had to my family weighed on my and made me feel very useless at times. I was so glad when I finally was earning more than enough to take care of my son and me. I've never forgotten that feeling of relief.
For me it was starting to work at Sunbelt and quickly getting medical benefits for me and even being able to add Russel (from our own pockets, but at a lower group-level cost). It was amazing!
Medical benefits mean a huge difference in overall financial security. I was uninsured briefly when I was between jobs and that's when my son was hospitalized at six for a severe autoimmune reaction which required eight more weeks of follow-up care. I do not know what would have happened if other forces had not helped me stay afloat. Similarly, even today, when we all have much more accessible health care insurance, it is devastating to see how multiple cancer diagnoses and related issues have upended the lives of family members we love dearly. Health is often the thing that can push people into poverty, sometimes over night.
Absolutely. The only reason Russel has not retired (he's 75) is that I'm covered through his work...come on, 65!
To press the ‘LIKE’ button seems wrong when what I want to express is the anger I feel for the injustice of the situation you find yourself in and countless others as well. Free Healthcare is a basic right when needed in my book and should be paid for out of general taxation. 🐰
Dang woman, those questions you ask at the beginning of this wondrously provocative post -- phew! I need many hours to wrap my head around the complexity of how we all go through life, feeling rich or poor, or richer or poorer than others....Hope to come back around and make a more articulate comment! But re: GREAT EXPECTATIONS -- that great classic has always stayed with me. I read it as a kid, and as an adult. More anon!
I look forward to whatever thoughts want to come out whenever they are ready, Bernadette. Honestly, I wrestled with a lot of the same issues as I tried to write it. I kept backing off of some of the more difficult issues as they manifested themselves in my own life.
I read recently a comment on this subject that talked about the notion of fairness in all of this and I think that's where I get stuck. How to make it all a little bit more fair, but then I consider all over again the question of okay, how should I contribute to making it more fair?
I'm glad I read GE now. I wonder if it would have made the same impact on me as a kid?
Okay here's my honest answers to your questions, Betsy! YIKES! "How do you define poor?"
Not having enough funds to pay bills. Going to sleep at night worrying about wracking up more debt just to get by....(thankfully not living like that at the moment but sadly had many months or years like that in my up-and-down financially unstable life/career).
"How do you define rich?"
Feeling fulfilled by my work and life and having enough funds to not only pay bills but not worry about spending $ to eat out or take a trip or buy a gift for someone (or myself).
"How comfortable are you when you are with people who you are richer or poorer than you are?"
Very interesting question. I am super comfortable with anyone who is wealthier (or more famous-ha)! than me if that person is comfortable with me not being on their financial strata. If they just treat me as their neighbor or college and not like a 2nd class citizen. I notice my own judgment of "rich" people is not very kind when certain rich people are not kind themselves....And yet I know on some level, I should have compassion for anyone who is clearly suffering (or emotionally impoverished) and sometimes I do, but sometimes it's challenging when their unkindness is out to demean others.
Which reminds me of Miss Havisham! I don't imagine I had compassion for her as a young woman when I read "Great Expectations" but now thinking of that visceral character, I can't relate to how outwardly "rich" she was but I can feel great empathy for her acute loneliness, dashed dreams and pain.
"How does the wealth or absence of it in others impact your expectations of them, if at all? "
My parents were middle class or lower middle class, because they had eight children to support, as well as foster kids, and foreign students in and out of our household...They were sometimes worried about paying bills, and I would hear the tension in my mother or father's voice when they discussed finances. We sometimes had to do without. We didn't have luxuries. BUT my parents instilled in all of us at an early age, that we shouldn't compare ourselves to others, if we complained that our next door neighbor had a "pool" or a "new bike".... When I was about 11 years of age, my parents somehow miraculously stretched their dollars and managed to buy us a cabin in the Berkshires. Really, a "shack" as my father called it...the biggest gift I could have ever dreamed of -- and many of my siblings as well. The happiest and "richest" days and nights and years of my childhood were going to this very rustic cabin (no running water, an outhouse) and swimming, hiking, picking wild flowers or berries, to our heart's content. ..
Even with the extraordinary gift of our "fancy" cabin, we didn't have a lot of extra "things" or even clothes. My sisters still give me their hand-me-downs and I love them!.... I have always identified with the working class, or those who struggle financially, coming from this family of eight children. So while I was taught the value of not comparing myself to others, who had more, I wasn't really taught or encouraged to make a lot of money. My parents did encourage me to pursue my dreams (of being a professional actor) but I don't think they or I focused on the financial aspect of my life, as a young actor, besides just making enough to get by. I never even allowed myself to dream it would be possible to make much money in this profession. I was so focused on my career, artistically, not financially, that it wasn't until I was much older, that I was able to save any money. And then a pandemic hits...And a strike hits. And there's two major work stoppages within a few years and yowsa, there goes one's savings! I do have regrets about not saving more money, but don't have any regrets about the rewarding profession I chose. And at 63 years of age, I say "it's never too late to learn" -- I save more now....and I also spend money on quality of life experiences (with family)...I hope to continue working well into my 70's and 80's and beyond... Thanks for this thought-provoking post Betsy. I'm sorry to be so loquacious but I have always found issues of class and finances so incredibly complex!
I am grateful for the time you took to share all this, Bernadette. There is so much here. As someone who forsook (is that a word) her journalistic career to get an MBA and go into business, I was often caught in the conflict of what was meaningful to do and practical to do. Having a child at a young age pushed me in the direction of practical. Reading about your journey shows me a version of the path I could have followed and didn't. I have mixed feelings about that. Being from a big family as we both are (five kids in mine, six stepsibs), that also underscores the value of sharing whatever we can whenever we can.
Re: comparing one's self to others -- that is such an important lesson. Where does it get us in the end? And how wonderful that your parents encouraged you. That's gold right there.
I hear ya! If I had a child or children, I would not have had the « luxury » to choose my artistic path…And in all likelihood would have gone the practical route . And pardon the typos in my long raw response! 🤣 Ie, colleague, not college! ❤️
Elizabeth, I am fortunate to have you as a reader. You describe my "journey" well.
By coincidence I recently read Great Expectations and was disappointed compared to Bleak House, which I also recently read and loved.
Thank you, David. I look forward to reading more from you as you figure it all out. Thanks, too, for your subscription!
I was hoping to read Bleak House next but Little Dorrit fell into my hands first and now I'm hooked so BH will have to wait. I am almost glad I waited so long to immerse myself in Dickens. I can appreciate his work so much more deeply than I could have years ago.
Little Dorrit is among my favourites of Dickens' novels. Enjoy!
It's amazing! I've been reading it all afternoon and still have a quarter of if the book to go.
I have yet to read LD but i did see the BBC adaptation. I'll have to think about that book for later this year ir 2025.
You aspire to be aware always and this strikes me as one of the best and healthiest things you can do for yourself and those around you. In particular, I will reflect further on "recognizing the complexity of individual experiences." As I've aged I realize that there is so much more to the daily experience of a human being that never shows on the surface.