My nose knew

A vindication story and some fun reads with an olfactory theme

Before we begin…

How do you regard noses – your own and others? Do you love a strong profile? Do you think about noses at all? And when it comes to olfactory performance, where would you say you are versus the rest of the world when it comes to your sense of smell? Rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 10 with 1= “a cadaver could rot in my walls for a week and I’d never know” and 10 = “I can tell what my neighbor ate for breakfast a week ago and I can do it from ten feet away.” 

Photo by Braydon Anderson on Unsplash...

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My nose: a vindication story

In one trip to Costco, my husband exchanged two throw rugs for a gift he may live to regret.

I wasn’t going to write a new post to you this week because it was my birthday week and I figured you could all use a little time off. But then a minor miracle happened and one thing led to another so here I am. I want to tell you a small story about an unexpected gift that has changed my life. 

It begins with two small throw rugs that my husband brought home from Costco four months ago. 

“Something smells,” I said later that evening when I entered the bedroom. 

“No it doesn’t,” my husband said. 

This is the way it’s been going for every year of our marriage. I smell something – lots of things. And he, with his large, finely carved Roman nose, can smell nothing. I can trace the source of an odor to a speck of dog poop left in the crack of a tennis shoe. I do not have to inhale the whole way before I can tell you that mold is beginning to form behind a sink or milk has begun to think about turning in the fridge. I re-wrap half-cut onions he has put in the refrigerator because he believes that draping a piece of plastic or wax paper over the exposed onion is enough to prevent the fumes from permeating the air both within the fridge and without. 

Historically, my persistence in tracking down objectionable odors has led to resistance from my loved one. He has accused my nose of being oversensitive. He has indicated, at times, that he feels held hostage to my nose. He has asked me to consider that I am, perhaps, overdoing the whole thing. I have, at times, thought he is trying to gaslight me.  

Let’s just say that my sense of smell has sometimes been a flashpoint in an otherwise happy relationship. We are not unique apparently. This NYT article explores what happens when a nose comes between two people. 

“The differences in their perceptions could make each feel that the other must be crazy. Was she imagining the smell? Was he lying and pretending he didn’t smell it?” - Leonard Sax M.D. “Why Stinky Socks May Bother Women More Than Men,” NYT

There are studies out there that help explain why women may have a more fine-tuned sense of smell than men. Women have a larger number of neurons in the area of the brain responsible for processing incoming scents. I didn’t know about any of these studies. I learned to keep all but the worst smells to myself. 

Then came the two rugs. We put them outside to air them – my husband did this with the usual eye roll and superior smile that tell me he is placating me. The rugs stayed out on the porch for four months and every time I walked by, the odor of fresh vomit wafted from the chair over which they were slung. Finally, the other day, he sighed and said he would try to return them. He bundled them into the car on Monday and off he went. 

Enter Duncan, the nice man behind the returns counter at Costco. “Why are you bringing them back?” he asked. 

Ed, my husband, tells me that he replied with a head shake and an apologetic, perhaps conspiratorial smile. “My wife says they smell bad.” 

“Well, they do,” Duncan said, apparently without a second of hesitation. “I can smell them from here.”

“I was stunned,” my mate told me later. “I almost didn’t want to tell you.” 

But he did. He had the grace to do it with a sheepish grin. Was I the tiniest bit annoyed that he believed Duncan when he didn’t believe me? No, I was not. Duncan was the icing on the cake. He was an independent third party, a man with the usual helping of odor-processing neurons for males, the same number as my husband presumably has. He could not be dismissed on any grounds at all. Duncan validated me and my nose. If I knew where he lived I’d send him a box of whatever he loves to smell the most. From this point forward, my nose will reign supreme in this household. 

Finally, I can breathe easier. 

A nose is a nose is a nose…in art and in reads both short and long

Illustrations for Nikolay Gogol's 'The Nose' by Julia Soboleva

• The Nose | Connections | The Metropolitan Museum of Art is a wonderful three-minute video by Masha Turchinsky of The Met whose own strong profile led to a curated collection and commentary about the nose. 

• If you’ve never read Gogol’s “The Nose”, here’s your chance. If you want to get to know Gogol and this story even better, pick up a copy of George Saunders’ A Swim in the Pond in the Rain: In Which Four Russian Masters Give a Master Class on Writing, Reading, and Life.  which will make you look at this and other short stories by Russian masters and consider all the ways to truly absorb a story. Here is a wonderful collection of illustrations for this story. 

• Here is Terry Gross with Harold McGee author of Nose Dive: A Field Guide to the World’s Smells in which he writes about why things smell the way they do — and the ways different chemicals combine to create surprising (and sometimes distasteful) odors. They talk about stinky cheese, cat pee – an essence used in food preparation!!! – mask breath and why cooking releases smells.

• And this brief essay from Brevity explores how certain smells can provide instant links to our pasts. 

Spark will definitely go dark next week

I did not take time off this week (even though I did keep things short and sweet for you) but I will be taking time off next week for sure. Spark will go dark next week while I indulge in a little family time with loved ones who have not visited for a long time. I will be thinking of you and saving up thoughts and books to share in the next few newsletters. Already on the radar: audiobooks in all their confusing wonderfulness, a look at young adult books that challenge my assumptions about why stories need to be categorized by age, adding and highlighting more of the writers from our community in the Spark Author Page more interviews with writers who share their journeys from idea to published book. 

There is no reason to stay away, completely though. Share a book rec, a poem, or just let us  know what you’re thinking about here in the comments or other meeting places such as Notes here on Substack or the new Threads offering over on Instagram, or IG itself. You can find me on either of those social media sites under the handle of @egmarro_spark. 

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I’ll be back next week. 

Gratefully yours, 

Betsy

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