Caffeine and Brown Noise

Or how I finally got a few thousand more words on my novel

Before we begin…

What do you do when your ability to concentrate is threatened? What tools do you reach for? How well do they work for you? And if you are an adult with ADHD or have experience with the condition, would you please help me with some research for my novel? 

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My two weeks of productivity

Sitting down today feels a little strange. The two weeks since we last connected here have been strangely full and feel, in retrospect, quite long even though I cannot point to any one thing that made it so. It could be because I am, in spite of my worst tendencies, achieving a level of productivity that has been elusive. 

For a while, it felt like this song was about me:

Then I took the Thanksgiving holiday off. The decision was a sudden one, driven entirely by an instinct for self preservation. I was a little ragged around the edges thanks to too many sleep-interrupted nights, too many days that seemed to revolve around the needs of Lily, our dog with cancer, and the anxiety of Frida, her healthier but confused canine companion. I was struggling to make a dent in the next section of my novel and I wanted to see what might happen if I simply obeyed my instincts to take an unplanned break.

I return to you refreshed from a peaceful Thanksgiving and high on the news, received Tuesday, that Lily needs no more chemo. She is on track for a full return to life as usual in a few weeks. I am also buoyed by some discoveries that have helped me return to a measure of productivity in my writing. For what it’s worth, here are my “discoveries” or, in some cases, rediscoveries.  

• Caffeine, in the right doses at the right time, is a miracle drug to a writer who believed she was a morning person. Turns out that a cup of coffee at 2 PM gives me three solid hours of writing time with energy to spare. Turns out that a morning person can also be an afternoon person or, lately, a night person. Makes me wonder: are there other stories I tell myself about me that aren’t necessarily true? 

• Brown Noise. This article, encountered while researching ADHD, sent me to Youtube where I’ve been playing this over and over again during my work sessions. It’s better than sound-canceling headphones for me. It’s like a blanket between me and distraction. The visuals could use a little work…

• Exhaust the dogs and they will sleep for those three hours without complaint. Mostly. Any complaints they do issue are obscured by the brown noise and a wall of steely resolve that I’ve not felt for too long and welcome. I can look right into a pair of beseeching eyes and look away again. 

• Pause and observe that no one keeled over dead or went into a decline when I did what I wanted to do and needed to do. 

These are the resigned looks of dogs whose writer is ignoring them. Mostly.

Call for research assistance: ADHD in adults

As I mentioned, I’ve been researching ADHD, particularly in adults, for my novel. One of my main characters is diagnosed as an adult and I want to understand her and her experience better. It’s quite possible that I’ve misunderstood the situation with her because there are other conditions that produce similar symptoms. If you have any experience with ADHD in adults or are a writer who has ADHD I would love to connect with you to be sure I am getting this right and treating the condition with the understanding and sensitivity it deserves. You can email me directly at elizabethmarro@substack.com to let me know how best to reach you.

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Books!

Just started …

Solito: A Memoir by poet Javier Zamore is a moving and vivid account of Zamora’s journey from Ecuador to the United States as a child on his own. Zamora kept large chunks of this story to himself for years but in these pages, he makes the reader feel each step, each moment of fear, elation, or exhaustion. 

Just finished…

Small Things Like These and Foster by Claire Keegan, both novellas, and the book Writing The Novella by Sharon Oard Warner. Keegan was new to me but I intend to read all of her work. These two novellas, the first about an ordinary man in midlife who resists then makes a decision that will change his life and the second, about a young girl who lives with relatives for the summer, are small books rooted in the mundane but each packs an emotional wallop when it holds up a mirror so we can see how much hides beneath the surfaces of a life. Warner’s book is a craft book that held more interest for me after reading Giovanni’s Room last month and now the two Keegan books. I’ve always struggled to write “short” fiction but perhaps writing a novella offers a new path for me and one that makes sense given how long it takes me to write a novel. 

Cradles of the Reich by Jennifer Coburn. I will be introducing you to Jennifer and this compelling novel next week but I encourage you not to wait. It is an excellent if unsettling read. 

Next up…

The Cruelest Month by Louise Penny - the third novel in Penny’s Inspector Gamache series arrived from the library this week and promises to satisfy my curiosity about whether or not Gamache survives the internal attacks of those who want to bring him down while offering another interlude in the peaceful but murderous village of Three Pines. Also: I remain fascinated by the marriage of Clara and Peter and wonder what shape that will take as she emerges from his shadow and shines on her own. 

Your book stacks: a gift box for Francia runneth over

“The piles just keep growing. I was just given a box of books (top picture). The second picture shows what I’m steadily reading now. This doesn’t even include the books I haven’t read yet on Kindle or audio books. I’ll be busy tackling these. It may seem crazy, but I’m hoping at least a few of my books will inspire my children to read them. I’m grateful for books and family. Grateful for gardens and animals. Grateful for Substack introducing me to new writers.!” - Francia M. 

What About You?

What are you reading or want to read these days? Share away. Send a photo of the stack of books that you’ve got going with a few words about how they came to you. We’ll feature your book stack in upcoming issues of Spark ( send photos to elizabethmarro@substack.com).

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Bookish Gift Ideas: Tailored for the Weirdos in Your Life

Know a Sherlock Holmes fanatic? Will you mother-in-law only read romances set in Victorian England? Do not fear. It’s the holiday season and the ever-generous Elizabeth Held is offering to help you find books tailored to those you love. Or like. Follow this link to What to read if… and leave your request. While you’re there, check out the wonderful suggestions coming from all over her community down in the comments section. It’s like having a lot of personal shoppers helping you out.

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A Reminder

As you know, Spark is and will remain free to all subscribers but your support is still welcomed. Here’s how you can show your love:

• Share Spark with friends and invite them to subscribe. Got a favorite issue? Share that one. Can’t pick? Share the whole archive and let them choose. Share widely. Share often. 

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That’s it for this week. Let me know you are and what you’re reading. If there’s an idea, book, or question you’d like to see in an upcoming issue of Spark, let us know!

And remember, If you like what you see or it resonates with you, please share Spark with a friend and take a minute to click the heart ❤️ below - it helps more folks to find us!

Ciao for now. 

Gratefully,

Betsy

Disclosure: I am an affiliate of Bookshop.org and I will earn a commission if you click through on any of the books mentioned here and make a purchase.

P.S. And now, your moment of Zen…Turtle Dreams

Situation Normal is the name of Michael Estrin’s newsletter. I read it faithfully every week for the (sometimes rueful) laughs and the connection with a writer whose perspective on life, love, Los Angeles, makes me like humans a whole lot more. He offered this photo from his recent trip to Bali with Christine, his spouse and the woman you want by your side when a “big, bold, boss monkey” invades your hotel room. He wrote all about his trip to Bali in this limited series of newsletters. Here is the photo that keeps him calm now that he’s home. He captured this turtle near Gili Meno. 

Calling for Your Contribution to “Moment of Zen”

What is YOUR moment of Zen? Send me your photos, a video, a drawing, a song, a poem, or anything with a visual that moved you, thrilled you, calmed you. Or just cracked you up. This feature is wide open for your own personal interpretation.

Come on, go through your photos, your memories or just keep your eyes and ears to the ground and then share. Send your photos/links, etc. to me by replying to this email or simply by sending to: elizabethmarro@substack.com. The main guidelines are probably already obvious: don’t hurt anyone  -- don’t send anything that violates the privacy of someone you love or even someone you hate, don’t send anything divisive, or aimed at disparaging others. Our Zen moments are to help us connect, to bond, to learn, to wonder, to share -- to escape the world for a little bit and return refreshed.